Taking a Personal Day No. 2

That's right people. I stayed home sick two whole days in a row. Something that I never would have accepted at home. I would have at least gone in for a few periods. Things just always seem so important. But today I didn't think I would be missing too much (even though it was TTT for those of you who know what that is). Anyway I was feeling a ton better. And last night when I went to bed I thought that I might go in today. But when that alarm clock rang at 6:30 I was like no. Yvonne supported the idea of staying homr so that was that and I spent the whole day right here. 

I went back to bed, had breakfast, took a shower. Of course I watched some Grey's Anatomy. Then I did some homework. Next I just sat downstairs and read Harry Potter. I should mention that it was raining all day. Not just a little sprinkle of rain but real rain all day. So reading was pretty appealing. Lunch. Siesta. Chemistry. Then I organized some pictures on my computer and yeah. That's pretty much what I did today. 

Tomorrow I'm definitely going to school, not beacause I'll have to rewrite that stupid American History X paper, but because its our last physics lesson before a test so that seems like a pretty important thing. Not that I'll have any medical reason to stay home tomorrow anyway.

Honestly, one of the worst parts of being sick is getting out of shape. All you do is eat, sleep, and lay around. I know that the first training passes after being sick are absolutely horrible. So well see how soon I get back into it. 

I've had some time to think lately and the scariest thing of this whole eperience is coming home with regret. It's not the language or the people or the situations that are scary, at least not for me. For me, my biggset fear is coming home with regrets. That would be such a horrible thing to realize once you get home. Though by no stretch of the imaginaion will this year or this experience be a waste, but coming home with regret would seriously make me question that. So the daily question is what will I regret doing or more in my case, what will I regret not doing.

For example, one of my main goals, no, my biggest goal comnig into this was to make connections so that I would feel like I have a second family here in Sweden. People know that I'm shy and honestly pretty bad at making those personal connections. I keep telling myself that it's still early but let's be honest, it's not early. It's Novemeber. I really want Christmas to be wonderful. But I'm afraid that I won't be able to be a true part of the family by then. And if not by Christmas what if I don't feel that way in June when it's time for me to leave. This may seem weird but I want leaving here to be sad and just as if not more tearful that when I left Indiana a couple of months ago.

I know that this is a two sided effort but let's be honest, it's more on me. I have to open up. I cannot allow myself to be as reserved as I want to be. Because if I don't, my whole year is going to be forced and weird and not very fun. Will I ever see Anton and Gustav as brothers? Coming into this I really really hoped so. And I still really do. I'm just realinzing that it's going to be a lot harder that I thought because unlike I maybe thought, the effort has to come from me. 

And I also want to be treated like a member of the family. Dont get me wrong, the lightness of chores has bee nice. (don't worry people, I still make my own bed and clean up after meals). But sometimes I wish I was told to do more things. Is that weird? I'm the family's first exchange student too so I guess we are both learning. 

And I think we all have a lot to learn.

Hey people, this whole exchnage thing isn't always a walk in the park!

And I've come to realized that I packed very poorly coming here. Well not very poorly, just a little poorly. The most embarrasing thing ever is the amount of shoes I brought. I think I brought more shoes than most people even own. Yeah, I brought 19 pairs of shoes. I know, so embarrassing. 

This is also a weird problem but I don't know what to ask for for my birthday! My family asked me to put up a list and I want to be helpful and help give them idea but I can't think of any. Help!

 

Oh yes, also, in a few weeks there is a school party and we are supposed to dress like a movie character. Does anybody (please!) have any ideas? I don't want anything too complicated, but something cool and unique. Ideas ideas??

On Thursay I have a Physics test and I'm getting a vaccination in case anyone was wondering. On Friday Jan is coming home from business in the US, he flies in to Copenhagen and Yvonne and I might leave right after school to get some time to see the city which would be really fun. 

Thanksgiving is still coming up and I still feel completely freaked out and unprepared. 

Aything else? I don't think so people. Let me end this with a quote, 

"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared." -Buddha 

..and some really random pictres of my Indiana life that I really like!

Julia and I in...London?

Katherine and I somewhere in Europe

My all time favorite picture from Homecoming 2012

Literally the last night of my summer.